advice · aerial yoga · Mind Body Spirit · progressive · Wellness · Yoga

Ask Roe About Life Blog


September 6, 2018

Turning Things Around

Ending Bad Situations by Manifesting The Truth

Reality is not an illusion, but the illusion of reality is real.
What do I mean by this?
What we surround ourselves with, becomes our reality. Reality and truth, in turn, can only be truly judged, when not only our 5 senses are active, but more importantly, our sixth sense.
The Truth can only be gauged by how many senses become awakened when presented with a specific situation.

Our 5 Senses:






Our 6th Sense:

If you only rely on television and limited resources for your information you are only using two senses, sight and sound; that’s not much of an experience. You need to delve further into the situation to use as many senses as possible to get a better hold on information. Only then can you truly judge the situation. Everything is hearsay until you can fully experience with all five, and for some of us, all six senses. Look hard for the truth, it’s often hidden under a pack of lies.

Choosing your Path

How do you know which path to choose? Often times we don’t know, we just blindly go forward trusting nothing and everything and taking things as they come, good or bad. Sometimes we feel the right path, through our intuition, and still, situations may be difficult. Sometimes our intuition is correct, and the choices we made have clearly resolved the situation for the better. These are subconscious choices, choices we often have no control over.


Why it is necessary sometimes.
That sounds ridiculous, but as I’ve often said, you can’t turn the other cheek, because the other cheek gets slapped, and you can’t fight fire with fire, it just creates more chaos. You fight fire with water, and put it out.
This is where the anger everyone tells you to “ let go” should be released. Throw something, yell, cry, call the person you’re pissed at and tell them what you think RELEASE IT ALL, and move on. There is no shame in calling out a toxic person who is hurting you. In fact, that’s how you take away their power, you extinguish it with the truth. This is when the choice of anger comes from self love, and the instinct to protect oneself and those you love. This is good anger, this is necessary anger, this is Shiva Kali Power. The Destroyers. They destroy the bad to let the good in.
For those of us who have this purpose in life, to bring out the worst in people, it is to destroy the bad, and make way for the good. Read the story of Kali FromTemple Purohit, here.
You will see the good and bad and why we need people around us in bad times to help balance us out, stand up with us and have our back. Raw anger is one of our purest forms, it’s just as pure as our divinity. The difference is a very fine line, and depends on how much control we are able to hold on to in the face of anger, especially coming from a place of abuse, or destruction. It needs to end. Abuse and destruction are more like a downward spiral made of chains. When you feel you can’t get out of the cycle, the chains grow stronger and take you down further. You have to completely sever a link, in order to get out of the cycle.
Anger comes from being pushed to far. The Buddha states, “holding on to anger is like holding a hot coal and expecting the other person to get burned.” Do not let the anger go blindly, if you do, you will send angry vibrations out into the world to create chaos. Focus the anger, and release, properly, it with as much force as it came at you. This may sound harsh, but if you re looking to break a link on the chain of destruction, it’s a necessity.


Happiness is not a choice, but a reward.
We all would like to choose happiness, but we can’t. It’s actually out of our control much of the time. If we simplify our lives, stay away from social media, news, politics, religion and other people we are usually at peace. We find some peace doing the things we love, whether it be reading, yoga, painting, listening to or playing music, riding a motorcycle, or cooking a meal, we all have our active meditations, designed to bring us to a happier state, but true happiness is a reward. True happiness comes from extreme self love and self confidence. If you choose to love yourself enough, and are confident in your worth, you can end your bad situations and emerge renewed, released and rewarded with happiness. This is a conscious choice we do have control over.Cut toxic people out of your life. Cut toxic habits out of your life. Speak up, speak out, speak loud! Happiness only eludes us as long as we let it.

Stand Up For Something, Even if it Means Sacrificing Everything – Colin Kaepernick.

Noticing the Signs

The signs are all around us and we never fully take notice of them. Actually, I think we only notice the bad signs, because we are so programmed to gear our thoughts toward negativity.

Our job is to notice the signs, both good and bad.

Our goal do our best to turn the bad signs into positive situations.

Our self love helps us begin to notice the good signs, or count our blessings, as so many say, and begin to manifest the truth of what we need to exist, and it is different for everyone.

My job is not to point out the good signs to you, if I did that, or more to the point, when I have to do that, you learn nothing.

Notice the Signs in your life and use this advice to turn things around for the better, by investing in the most important person you know, yourself.

Keep Loving You


Mind Body Spirit · progressive

It Should Have Ended with Columbine


Ask Roe
Redefine Wellness

February 22, 2018

It Should Have Ended with Columbine


The Word Columbine Still Strikes Fear in my Heart.

American Horror Story, Murder House. The episode where Tate Langdon is killed because he went on a shooting spree at his high school, in 1994 (the year I graduated). He took the lives of 15  students who can come back and confront him on Halloween. We later find out he’s as well as the students are spirits who can interact with living people on specific days, or in the murder house.

My immediate thought was Columbine. My thought is always Columbine, because it happened four years after I graduated high school, and only one year after my sister graduated.  As an optimistic kid, I thought the adults would take care of it, but it happened again and again, and again: until finally it happened to five and six year olds.

This has to be the end, I told myself. I was still that optimistic truting kid. Then the mass shooting at Pulse, The Vegas Shooting, now Parkland. Within months. And it’s taking children to raise their voices,  to really get people to listen, where previous generations (mine included) have failed.

Generation X –  The generation best known for Friends, Will and Grace, and Boy Meets World.  Friends. I’ve heard the show described as “mean”, but I can say that it mimics my friendships I cherish from childhood. I often describe my college days as a lot like the movie, Reality Bites. The days where a 32oz. Big Gulp of Diet Coke, a Marlboro Light and a Snickers Bar was considered lunch. I  absolutely miss those days. I am eternally grateful those things were a part of my life.

As for Friends, one of my all time favorites. I’ve seen Ross described as a homophobe, but coming out was becoming more common, and so was more homophobia.  Friends brilliantly had Ross married to a lesbian, and have a child together. He now needs to deal with being a divorced father of a boy with 2 moms. It was 1994. It made many people uncomfortable, but dealing with the issue through comedy, was a great way to send a message. Remember, Ross walked Carol (his ex-wife) down the aisle in her commitment ceremony to Susan, when Carol’s parents refused to show up.  Ellen DeGeneres came out on TV. So did many beloved TV characters. Now we have out and proud leading actors, in Television, Film and Stage. The world is truly changing. My childhood was filled with fears of being near AIDS patients;  we grew, we educated ourselves, we know that information is false.

Look at Gen-X as the generation that outwardly began to accept and tackle issues that 10 years earlier were completely taboo. We have definitely helped pave the way. Now is the time to work together. We want to help finish the fight. I know I do.

I’ve read, that there is going to be a student walk out, on April 20th, the anniversary of the Columbine Shooting. I hope this walk out is true, and I want every student to know that I am on your side, and so excited to see a new generation pick up where we left off. Look to us for guidance. You may have the social media skills, but we have the wisdom, because we’ve been dealing with this for more than 3 decades. Find your teachers. Arm yourself with knowledge, because knowledge is power.

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Mind Body Spirit · progressive · resist

Assault of the Mind Body Spirit

Lessons and Blessings

February 5, 2018 (my 42nd birthday)

Life’s Purpose Revealed

Assault of the Mind Body Spirit


I struggled with what to write. I wanted to add my original, horrible story to the Me Too Campaign which made me remember 50 more incidents that I would absolutely classify as sexual assault. I’ve said it, and so did a friend, the 80’s and 90’s were a nightmare.

My reasons for holding off  were simply embarrassment and shame. With each little inappropriate touch you hate yourself more and see yourself less.

The following is my official police statement from an incident that occurred at Sanford/Orlando International airport. It gave me a wicked PTSD panic attack. The officer working with me, initially had verified my story via camera footage. He stated the assault was “very clear”.

This morning his Captain called and tried to say nothing inappropriate happened because I had an “anomaly” in my pelvic area (my pocket). I was wearing yoga pants with no pockets. The woman put her hands only on my vagina. Absolutely no protocol was followed. She crouched down and touched me, while the male agent had his back turned.

I’ve been asked a few times before to stand on that little mat, and hold out my arms, while at least one other agent was watching. This did not happen, I wasn’t asked to do that, only my vagina was touched.

The Police Captain was not helpful at first, but stuttering by the end of my speech. I schooled this Captain on rape, assault, the Me Too Campaign and why we need more allies, not bureaucracy. I am sickened by his response, and have emailed The Sanford Herald, and cc’d the Sanford PD so they see I won’t back down. I’ve also left a message for Gloria Allred. I was told by the police captain that since her hands were “only on my vagina for 3-5 seconds” it won’t be considered assault  THAT’S THE EXCUSE!!!! It’s appalling. As if she beat the clock, and won. No, not on my body.

When I was able to speak to the TSA training supervisor, she assured me that was SOP, but needed to review the tapes, that I hope don’t go missing. I told her, under no circumstances is this OK. IT IS ASSAULT. I feel it is my mission to see this through to the end, and help STOP ABUSE OF POWER.

The police captain also changed his story, after a tweet calling him out on what he said. He called back to say he didn’t mean in that way, he meant that he had the footage reviewed and archived with a perfect screenshot showing the assault lasted 3-5 seconds. Spin it anyway you want; it’s a lie captain, it’s a lie,

We women are paid less, looked at as less than we are, and ignored and abused. Enough is Enough. Times up. Me Too. All valid, all true, all worthy of opening your mind to hear the stories from the women who were afraid, brushed off, or much worse.

I was raped by my now ex-husband on February 10, 2009. He’s not in jail. I had a case, he had some dirty tricks. In our court document for our divorce (which I pushed through in 6 months), the judge asked about the rape charge. His lawyers response said it all, “my client neither admits to nor denies the charge of rape.” Those words are still like poison to me. I was assaulted by the TSA agent almost 9 years later. You never fully heal. You never fully feel safe. You don’t trust much. You have severe panic and anxiety. You get quick to anger when you feel unsafe. You speak out more, once the rage fades a bit. YOU ARE NOT THE SAME – EVER.

I will say this:

This Warrior is WOKE and I won’t rest until  get justice for myself and the many unheard survivors of sexual assault and rape. Hell No, Not Today Satan. Getting out a  severely abusive relationship with a violent alcoholic, I feel it is my duty now to be the large voice I know I can be.

I was profiled at the airport.  I’m almost always profiled at the airport. No one really believed me. I would go to airports in catsuits with camel toe and my breasts almost out to prove I am not looking to harm people. Now I try to let my tattoos show, and I get friendlier faces when I do that. I see many people stiffen in airports when I walk in. I had another incident at Dane County Airport where the airport employee wouldn’t let me walk to the counter to speak to the airline. She closed the rope and I was pushed toward the kiosk. Five minutes later two tall white men walked in and she opened the rope for them, the same rope she closed when I tried to walk through.

I am of Middle Eastern, Southern Italian and Greek descent. I look Mediterranean. Olive skin, almond shaped hazel eyes. Below is my DNA. When I first got this back, I was so happy because my looks finally made sense. I come from the birth of civilization, democracy and Renaissance Art. This is me.





Here’s my statement, its been corroborated, because “my truth is there.

Thank you for your help so far. Below is my account of the incident.

On February 4, 2018, I was traveling home to NY from Orlando, by way of Sanford Airport. We entered the airport around 1:30 pm and between 1:45 and 2:30 we were going through security, the first row, by the glass. I had set out all my toiletries and shoes, etc. in the bins and i waited my turn to go through the machine. I was told I had something in my pocket, but I had no pockets. I was wearing black yoga pants and a grey sweatshirt, black sneakers. I was asked to go to a private screening room but I refused. I have often been profiled being Middle Eastern and Greek/Southern Italian.

There was a female agent who pointed to a screen, depicting a body outline with a yellow square shaped (what looked like a sticker) mark close to my pelvic area.

After refusing the private search, I was waiting for at least 2 more agents to come over and to spread my arms for the typical pat down. The female agent, short hair, thick dark glasses was looking at my pelvic area, not waiting for anyone else (a male agent had his back turned, I believe) she put her hands on my vagina and pushed her right thumb into my left labia. I was in shock and also afraid to say anything because I wanted to get home without incident.


My fear, looking like I do, was that I would have been in TSA holding for hours with no contact to help me sort this out.

After deplaning and beginning to drive home I had a panic attack. My PTSD for a rape 9 years ago (February 10, 2009) kicked in and I was unable to drive myself home.

Never The Less, She Persisted.

Here’s my News Channel 12 Westchester interview. Turn to Tara

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